it might have been quicker

it might have been easier.

it might have been paved with gold

through arches of sunlight.

it might have taken you home

or granted you freedom.

but how do you know?

you've begun this path.

follow it until there's nothing more to follow.

when i'm jealous

i realize how small i am

if this is a war

then let me lose

i need to be destroyed

to be rebuilt.

while you were reading,

you missed your chance to write.

it may seem strange to think

but there is a person

inside of everyone.

you would not believe

all the things that you have seen

but have never cared

to realize

are we in a storybook somewhere,

or are we our own story?

caus i'd prefer the latter.

it will happen

before you've realized what has happened

the pacific is screaming in my ears
as if it didn't exist
until it divided us.

but maybe someday
the wind will carry your breaths,
and the ocean will carry my tears,

for thousands of miles,
through hundreds of years,

until they meet to form a cloud
smaller than anyone can see,
and float on to eternity.

yes, you should

i miss you...

...when you're here

when i seem fine,

i'm not.

when i hug you goodbye,

i'm dying inside.

when i call you

i'm wishing i were there.

when i say i'm sleeping

i'm really crying myself to sleep.

i just don't have the guts to tell you.

not everything

needs a deadline

and i've never been so sure of something

or so ashamed that i'm hesitating.

i've never been so eager

or so reclusive.

because i know i will never have enough heart

to give to you

to deserve yours.

the most important things

will only be said once

i met a man once. his feet were in the sky,

and he walked where no one did.

but his heart and mind were grounded strong,

his feelings and thoughts were hid.

he kept like this for quite some time

but he got tired fast.

his feet fell down, his head flipped up

and his heart just could not last.

For this, I say fly.

Be free, my friends.

Lift your feet from off the ground.

And when your feet can't take you away,

keep your mind held skyward bound.

how quickly comes insanity

how loudly do we land

be loud

or not at all

i'd rather be your convenience

than your regret

our screens have convinced us

that the cold wind and the pain of fever

are all suffering, all unnatural.

yea, well maybe.

but is it more natural

to laugh at death?

to hide from the sun?

to keep love in our heads

rather than our hands?

do you love me?

I don't love you

yet

the one time you call

will be the time i let it ring.

and the one minute you tell me i'm worth it

will be the minute i tell myself i'm not.

and the one second you decide that you can't live without me.

will be the second i decide that i can't live

because i've always been without you.

run out and meet life

before it's too late.

it's been waiting just for you

and it won't wait forever.

i am certain

that it is a dangerous thing

to be certain.

sometimes...the exit is all you have

stop.

right now.

good.

we're making progress.

when the sunlight hits my back,

I like to think that all its rays

are giving me a little push.

all i need

is for you to show me

that there is a heart that's still alive

in this place.

even though you're hundreds of miles away,

and you have countless closer friends,

you're the closest thing to a best friend that I have.

thank you.

touch, barely, with the tips of your fingers

and you'll push away what you meant to keep.

grasp, withholding no speck of fear within your body

and you will always catch what you're reaching for.

just be ready to fall.

you can't stop the bullets

unless you stop firing, yourself.

strawberry poppyseeds

lemon-grit toes

shoe-shine sasparilla

you and me.

the most different of things

can sometimes sound great together.

you can either be a hero or a lover

divide yourself for many or give yourself wholly to one.

you cannot give a part of yourself to someone who gives freely of their whole self.

The Pheonix Dies Last

if this fire inside consumes me

and i become nothing more than ashes

then i will be honored

to feed the earth.

this is life

Pictures

When I look through these pictures

I wish I knew how you felt in these moments.

Were you happy?

Was that smile real?

Were you sad, for some reason you never told anyone?

What were you thinking about?

I wish I could ask you.

I wish it weren't strange of me to ask such a thing.

I wish we could be closer

than the closest we'll ever get.

you aren't my crutch

you were never my crutch

i was just looking for something to lean on

while you were pulling me down

I should have known better

than to lean on the one who was pulling me.

you are beautiful

like white streaks of silver ash that touch wings and fly.

Yet...cold...

somehow.

set them free

let them shine

they shall all be stars

in your mind's sky.

月のうしお / The Moon's Tide

すう年前に

よく泣いていた

あたしは寂しかた

月のうしお

静かな夜に

きみをつれてきた

きみだけが幸せくれたんだ

でも、今...

来る時のように

きみはさった

いつまでも忘れられない

A long time ago,

I was lonely

I cried so much.

The moon's tide,

on a quiet night,

brought you.

you were the only one who gave me happiness

but, now...

as quick as you came,

you left.

I will never forget.

-Original Japanese Lyrics by Kisara Onuma and me

you can't live with an arrow in your heart forever.
you must tear it out.

it's going to be painful.
there's no anesthesia for removing love.

if you were in my arms again,

the rain would still be falling.

you aren't my sunshine anymore.

Loving you

is the last thing i'll ever be certain of.

I miss you

more than I've ever thought I could miss someone.

Where Did My Heart Go?

when you said those things,

i thought you were talking about me

then i realized

they were about him

my heart should have broken

but it didn't

there was nothing left to break

Why Do You Feel This Way?

my heart is not a train.

my heart is a pedestrian.

It chooses where it will go

and it won't wait for traffic.

What's Behind That Smile Of Yours?

"i miss you...

more than it seems."

Is Love Dead?

love is alive

all you need to do

is forget "i"

and flip the "al"

to begin with "la"

Why Won't You Forgive Me?

i promise you

one day

i'll say those words.

but not today.

not for a while.

What is Maturity Then?

maturity isn't about becoming emotionless.

it's about discovering what deserves your heart's time

and what does not.

it isn't about becoming some invincible superhuman.

it's about accepting that some things

require you to be vulnerable.

Why Don't You Find Someone Else?

because I know what my heart says

and it tells me

to die every night

and bear every day

until you are ready

to use your heart again.

and there's an ounce of hope in here

that believes the day you're ready

will be the day

I can live through the night

and know in the morning

that love is still alive.

Why Are You Getting So Angry?

well, do you ever wonder

what it's like to be

just a scribble of pen

in someone's calendar?

that's how you make me feel.

Why Do You Look Away When I Look At You?

if i see your eyes

staring at mine,

i'm afraid we won't feel the same

that you won't long for me

the same way i long for you

so i keep safe:

i stop before I fall

the way I did before.

How Do I Cope With What They Did To Me?

when you feel like you're in hell,

you try anything and everything

to find water.

just remember,

the devil's water

will make you sick.

How Do I Become A Hero?

when your words

have become magic spells

that mend broken hearts,

when your fingers

have become magic wands

that comfort those in pain,

when you can fly

so you can reach

the furthest and weakest hands,

when you become invisible

so your pride

can never be fed,

then you have become a hero.

Why Is The World So Boring?

when's the last time

you looked straight up

at the sky?

when's the last time

you stopped your life

and stood in awe of it all?

when's the last time

you quit talking

and actually listened?

when's the last time

you gave the world

a chance?

Why Am I Different?

you've broken free,

chosen not to follow,

but to lead.

be vigilant

for others will follow you

into unwinnable battles.

they will be your very strength

and you, theirs.

but winning isn't so important

when having people who believe in you

is the truest victory of all.

I've Messed Things Up. Now What?

nothing in this world

has only one window of opportunity.

What Difference Do My Decisions Make To The People Around Me?

our lives are not our own.

for every decision we make

there are people we affect.

some wonder,

"should i do that too?"

others will laugh with you

or cry with you

depending on the

weight of your decisions

and which direction

that weight is headed.

Is There Anyone I Can Hold On To?

no matter what or who

or how or why

there will always be someone

right there with you

making sure you don't drown.

even in these high waters.

all you have to do

is call out for help.

Am I Free? Have I Finally Escaped?

sometimes when you escape

the sky you see is really

the same bars in disguise.

How Long Can We Keep This Fire In Our Hearts?

for as long as the fire

is given

from candle

to candle,

the fire will never burn out.

How do I get out of here?

when something blocks the way

to living your life

you must break free from it

and never once think

that you made the wrong choice.

Why Doesn't Anyone Care About the Earth?

because we can't let go.

we will one day

when the tables turn

and the earth forces us

to let go of everything

that we think is necessary.

be patient.

it will be soon.

Why Can't I Let Go?

you have to move on from the things that are bad for you

even if it means letting the good go with them.

then again, some things are never meant to leave.

Why Do I Want Things That I Shouldn't Want?

because you're allowing your mind to guide you

and neglecting all that is within your heart.

you may choose this,

but someday your heart will rebel against you

or die trying.

How Can My Heart Live Again?

in every moment,

in every chance you get,

let it breathe,

let it speak.

Do I Have A Heart?

one day your heart will wake up and start speaking to you

with words you've never heard before.

but somehow, you'll understand it all perfectly

and wish you'd have heard them sooner.

Why Do I Cry All The Time?

because your body knows something you don't.

listen closer, and you'll hear what's really crying inside of you.

Where Do I Go From Here?

follow the path

that your feet make for you.

use the compass

that is your heart.

Where Am I?

you're somewhere

between yesterday and tommorrow.

so paint the walls of today

so that someone might trace your steps

and find you

wherever tommorrow is.

Why Are We Here?

because every day we have,

we make a decision

that today is worth it.

and it is so worth it.